Okay---we're finally winding down to the big finale. It's funny to think of how far we've come and the losers we've had to endure to get here.---However, do you all agree that a 2 hour episode was a little much yesterday? Considering--the Frank drama was soooo drawn out---we could have cut it down by 1/2 hour. But anyway...I can assure you I will get down to business and try and hit the highlights and not drag out this sucker longer than it needs to be.
Okay first off, we get to hear what Frank's drama is all about pretty early on...(after all the recapping of the final 3 from the first night to now). And by now, we all know that Frank apparently has discovered through this journey that although he really really has a connection with Ali and is falling for her---he might still have feelings for his ex...Nicole. After he walked the freaking 50 miles through the streets of Chicago, he gets to her hotel room? Uh...I think a cab would have probably gotten you there in record time. Anyway...she's so surprised that she doesn't even question..."uh...excuse me???? who are these camera men? Where is my talent and release form for signature???"--I know...I know...you're right...they probably edited that out. Once she happily lets him in. He begins by telling her how great Ali is...how much he likes her...how connected he feels to her---hmmm...was anyone else thinking--is this your master plan to get Nicole back? And of course Nicole, sits there and listens and no doubt is waiting for him to say...BUT I love you...instead, he said, "I had to come back here and see if all this confusion I was feeling was because I still had feelings for you"--I might have missed it...but I think she said she still wants him back and that life is awful without him and then they hug, cry, kiss, and snuggle...and he tells the camera crew he knows what he needs to do...not Nicole...well...not right away at least. He then reveals to Nicole that he must travel to Tahiti and let Ali know what he's decided. Really...you couldn't get the producers to send her a message? You just had to go to all the way to paradise with a humongo suitcase to break it off??? Way to get a free trip out of it. I was convinced Nicole was in the suitcase.
Now....let me go on record to say that if it were me...and my ex came over and was talking of getting back with me...the first thing I'd ask him is, "Did you sleep with this chick?" I guess that doesn't matter to her---or wait...another editing decision I bet. I wouldn't have taken that fool back---but that's just me.
Okay...now on to paradise.
Her first date was with Roberto... not much to say other than they flew (another fear of flying B.S. reminder on Ali's part) to what they kept calling a heart shaped reef or island...looked more like a kidney bean to me...or as my dear friend Katie put it...a boomerang. Anyway...it was gorgeous, they seemed to be enjoying themselves A LOT. Then dinner time came around and Roberto put on his serious face only to tell her that he thinks he falling in love with her. She pulls out the slut card---(the fantasy suite invitation card) and I love how every guy looked surprised to see it. Of course they decide to use it. Thankfully there were no fireworks or volcano eruption visuals.
Next day...she goes on her date with Cape Cod Chris. As you all know I love the dude...but enough about your mom and family...okay?--I mean, I know that makes him endearing to us all but it's kinda of mood killer, too. So they also get to see the beautiful scenery from a "top of the line" catamaran. They seem to be having a wonderful time, a lot of snuggling and laughing. Then they half arrive at their destination and they have to swim to their private little island. I could not stop busting up at the fact that---I'm pretty sure Chris expected they would jump in ...freestyle swim to the island and then have time for snuggle snuggle...but instead Ali had other ideas...she wants to start snuggling right away and I don't know about you...but his egg-beater treading water kick...looked a little difficult with her hanging all over him. Sheesh...give the guy a second to catch his breath. Then they finally reach the part of the ocean they can stand in and I noticed he had some very handy aqua socks to protect his footsies---while she's hanging all over him. More kissing...laughing...pearl finding (I bet he makes her some jewelry with those pearls for the finale) and then dinner time. Man oh man...he really put it all out there. He told her he sees his whole future with her, he will live anywhere with her, and that he loves her! This guy is so gonna get a broken heart. Once again...the slut card comes out and he acts surprised and then of course they jump on that!
The next day...we have to endure a face to face with Chris Harrison and Frank about what he's decided and how he's going to tell Ali...How about..."Peace out chick...thanks for the awesome trip around the world, but my girlfriend is packed in my suitcase and I'd like to see Tahiti with her!"
We finally have the break up, she's way to devastated...I mean really...you just slept with 2 other dudes...how can you be so upset. I think a thank you would have been in order. Thank you for not making me have to pick someone tonight. The one thing that scares me is the foreshadowing that took place. She kept going on and on about how this really shook her to the core and now she's second guessing if any of these guys are there for her. STUPID woman!
Well folks...I will skip over all the tears and major cry fests between them both and just say...that I think she's got 2 good guys left and if she decides to leave everything to find love and then chooses to stay alone...well then....Good freaking riddance!
Next week, we get a break from Ali and her drama and get to watch the men tell all. That should be good. All the psychos are back in full force. Just think...we have Whoa Hair, Forehead, Kasey the Deaf who will guard and protect her heart, Weatherman---oh man...that is gonna be good.
Well until next week,
Don't forget to stop and smell the roses.
--Lindaffodil
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